I also realised that a plan that does the thinking for you takes away your power - it makes your weight loss dependent on other people. WELL OF COURSE!!! How would they make money if we could all do it ourselves - so the programs don't foster autonomy, they tell you what to think, but don't really teach you how to think. So the next really good thing I got, was autonomy. I realised about 2 weeks into the round that it would be my only one - and I was gettin' my money's worth. I learned what I could - and expanded on it. I got control of my own weight loss.
I changed my mindset from 'weight loss' to wellness. Quite frankly, I don't give a flying f%&k about my weight anymore. I want to be well, fit, healthy and strong. Numbers mean nothing to me. I want to nourish my body, feel energised, happy and loved.
The most amazing thing that came out of 12WBT for me is Renée. I didn't go into 12WBT expecting to find a best friend, but I did. I am grateful every day that I did meet her though. She is beautiful, smart, funny, a bit of a dork (we Star Wars quote all the time), an amazing Mum and wife, and a very strong and awesome woman. She has lost over 55kg which is just unbelievable to me..... that is the weight of my friend B!!!! Renée and I both had such similar upbringings, and we both grew up with the same self esteem issues. There have been periods in our lives we have both been burdened by depression, anxiety and shame. We both chose food as our primary drug of choice to help us deal with stressors in our life.
We often joke about how similar we are, we really are like two sides of the same coin. We communicate almost every day, sometimes many, many, many times a day - and if we don't it's so weird - that we have to before bed! I can honestly say, I've loved very few people as much as I do her - she is family. She inspires me, she makes me laugh, she supports me when I'm low, and she picks me up - helps me dust myself off and get back to it. When I'm upset, sometimes just a text from her is all I need to smile. I love her, and I'm so glad I did 12WBT or I would never have met her.
Well, actually - I have never actually met her!! You see, she lives in another state. So we spend lots of time on the computer, phones texting etc.... but we have not been face to face yet! In April, we are travelling to Melbourne, to meet. We are staying with my brother, seeing a comedy show and we are going t have an awesome time. I am so excited!!!!
We have both been struggling a bit of late, we have both really gone off the rails with our nutrition, and training. She has put on some weight, and it is really, really getting her down. It's really upset me - I can't just see her to give her a hug like you're supposed to - we can't just go out for a coffee or a drink to talk about it. It's kinda a pain.
We have decided to embark on a 3 day detox, followed by a really amazing, yummy healthy meal plan that will have us feeling ourselves in no time. We have made a commitment to each other to follow the plan, work out 5/6 days a week, and to support each other. I feel so blessed to have her in my life, and to have her supporting me on my journey to wellness.
I just hope that she knows she can always lean on me, because we all need somebody to lean on...... yep, sounds to me like we need some old school 80's!!